jusummerhayes

A simple life

“We must become so alone, so utterly alone, that we withdraw into our innermost self. It is a way of bitter suffering. But then our solitude is overcome, we are no longer alone, for we find that our innermost self is the spirit, that it is God, the indivisible. And suddenly we find ourselves in the midst of the world, yet undisturbed by its multiplicity, for our innermost soul we know ourselves to be one with all being.”
Hermann Hesse

I'm back home in Devon — same routine as always. 

But that's life, right?

Why should it be any different? I mean, it wasn't as if I went to bed praying for something different.

Right about now, I'd have been working on a new plan, one cooked up on holiday. Don't ask me why but, previously, it was always the way, namely, I was inspired to turn my life around (yes, seriously) by pressing a slew of new buttons and giving up a host of failed dreams.

No more!

That's not quite true. It's simply the case that nothing is arising or waking me up from my oh-so-quiet life. Actually, I've still got a long way to travel before I'm at last wearing my clothes and not someone else's. 

What do I mean?

Simply this. Life is life. Right here, right now. And the less I'm driven, the less I'm at odds with my extant circumstances, the happier I am — and it's not something I will but instead how I'm expressed. That means, falling into the boundless acceptance that life offers.

As to what the future holds — across all areas of my life — who knows. Who really knows? But as I've said so many times, it's not about leaving behind a cloud of uncertainty in my deeds and words but to simplify everything. Yes, that's it. To simplify all areas of my life to the point where I can focus on the few things that still hold my attention. That doesn't mean running away but it does mean enjoying things to a greater extent than previously. 

Damn. Here I go again. Conjuring up images of the forever after!

All I can do — all I can ever do — is lean into the present moment, and never forget that this day will never come again alongside all the doubt, grief, joy, contentment and peace that is enjoined with the deeply transcendent experience we call life.

Blessings and much love, Ju

Photo by Casper Johansson on Unsplash


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