jusummerhayes

Here we go...again

Photo by Hannah Tims on Unsplash
Photo by Hannah Tims on Unsplash
This is your life and it's ending one moment at a time.
Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

It's on the rise: the noise, the pollution, the haste to get on.

Why?

'Cos we've no choice.

Perhaps.

Yesterday, and not for the first time, I worked — this time on the legal stuff. I didn't have to — not at all — but with my work (mostly) it's all or nothing: I've either got nothing, or practically nothing and then, boom!, I'm almost out of breath, overloaded with first one behemoth contract, and then a prolix NDA, before being knocked sideways with another gnarly problem to unravel and postulate on. 

I feel better for having sorted things and at least this way I can ease myself into the week, and leave enough time for a few gentle walks, some poetry and meditation in nature.

But it won't last. 

I can read the runes — in spades.

How long I'll stick with someone's else's programme remains a moot point. It might be another year, or longer but it ain't where I'm headed. You know, all that office shit — the banter — and playing by a set of 19th century, fit-in-or-be-replaced rules.

But, hey, I've said all this before, and even I'm bored of the sound of this little tune. I was going to say Looney Tune (sic) but I think that would be an insult to the programme-makers.

In any event, my biggest challenge — or certainly one that's writ large on my psyche — is to keep it nice and slow. Not to be running on empty and to make time for me. Plenty of time.

I know that will be a lot, lot easier working from home because my every step, every call and every conversation can't be monitored; and I'm happy to take on that skirmish sooner rather than later. 

As you can imagine, not in a devious way, I've been building my case. Will my argument with the day? I don't know but I'll let you know how things work out. 

One thing I'm clear about is that my well-being — in the most psychedelic, loving and beautiful way — has been immeasurably enriched by being at home (I know it's not been for everyone) and if I can bring that to the fore, demonstrating how much better I've been, felt about myself and been able to apply to my work then (fingers crossed) I'm hopeful that the bosses will be able to see and recognise that too.

Anyhow, it's Sunday. A day of rest. I've got a little monologue to record, which I'll upload to Patreon and share here later but other than that, I'm going to go take Alfie out and see what nature's been up to overnight.

Have a good one.

Blessings, Ju


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