jusummerhayes

True self

Despite holding down a full-time job, the urge to create and share (and make some money...🙏) has not diminished. 

Indeed, right now, I feel more alive to my (real) work than I have for a long time.

Yes, I know, that sounds awfully pretentious — my apologies — but, anyone looking in, would question why I continue to write, record and speak about true self — my sine qua non (actually it's not mine in an ownership sense but something that I'm inextricably drawn to).

To make sure that I don't waste time doing too many things, over the past few weeks I've deleted many old social media sites and started to clean up the sites that I will continue to use in 2020 including YouTube, Livejournal, Patreon and Mixcloud. As I've previously said, I should have done it back in 2016 but finding a job back in legal practice has distracted what would otherwise have been a more immersive, creative journey.

In time, I'll write an essay (no, not that type but something a little more enlivening 😀) where I'll once again set out my store on what exactly I'm offering both online and off. It's not rocket science. In essence, I want to share my love of life in all its manifestations and how, perhaps by way of insight or example, those people that are drawn to a non-dual or contemplative perspective might self-enquire why it seems impossible to quieten the Lizard Brain and forever live in the fog of not finding meaning with their work, life and everything else that shows up.

Trust me, I'm not setting myself up as some sort of thought leader, expert or guru — yuk, yuk, yuk — but rather someone who's investigated too many personal development programmes to know that the paradigm that never questions our inner self, is one locked on the horns of trying to control our outer circumstances, which never lasts long. 

Sorry, again that sounds holier than thou. I'm just an ordinary bloke who's thrashed around in the weeds looking for answers to the usual array of questions, including:

Who am I?
Why am I here?
What's my purpose?

I'd be lying if I didn't admit to wanting to build a small following of like-minded people but there again, I accept that true self is not a best seller unless that is I was prepared to compromise my inalienable belief in its mystical source and adopt a cheerleader pose exhorting (as so many people do) that you can, with the right level of grit, determination and effort, be the best version of you. Don't misunderstand me; I'm not saying that you shouldn't work on yourself but then again, if you don't know who you are at the most fundamental level, why bother?

As well as the creative journey, I'd also like to start doing one-day events where I can share my experience of true self. I'd also like to rebuild my coaching practice but not this time solely in the legal space but to a wider audience. I still feel that I've something to offer the profession but from past experience, unless said lawyers are willing to drop all knowing and adopt beginner's mind, even for a few hours, it's going to be hard to engage with them when their logical, problem-solving brain will want to take away something to chew on. And I'm not offering that!

Finally, I'm eternally grateful to all those people who have supported my work over the years. It means a lot — and I say that from the bottom of my heart.

Onwards, forever onwards.

Deep bows.

Blessings,

Julian

Photo by JR Korpa on Unsplash

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