March 1st, 2020

speaker, consultant, coach

I never finish anything

**Spoiler alert: this post isn't just about being a starter/non-finisher**

Yet again, I had a crap night's sleep.

I went to bed early, hoping to get eight hours of rest but got up three times to visit the little boy's room. I'd been to the gym and had drunk a couple of pints of water, thinking I didn't want to get a drum-beat of a headache, as I often do when I forget to drink. It was clearly a mistake. In the end, at 3 am, I just lay there waiting for my alarm clock to go off at 5 am. 

Ah, never mind. Hopefully, I'll be able to have a little nap this afternoon. If not, I'll have to make do with another early night and hope for the best.

If you recall, in yesterday's slightly hurried post, I committed to writing about new things. I gave a list but should have said that that wasn't determinative but rather an indicator of where I might direct my attention. Of course, like I always do, I was overridden first thing with a strong emotional sense of what I should share and indeed the first Tweet of the day was on this very topic — i.e. finishing stuff.

My starting point was to Google the topic. No surprise: there are lots of 'how to' posts but that's not my point. You see, something else started to emerge that's on all fours with a number of other problem areas of my life; namely, I'm beginning to wonder if I've got some of, if not many of, the symptoms of bipolar disorder:

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My tweets

speaker, consultant, coach

I know...nothing

Perhaps that should be my life's work: not knowing.

Truly, yes, I've lived a few years — a very short time in the earth's history — but what have I learnt?

Nothing, really.

Sure, I've acquired a bushel of skills but none that would keep me alive. I mean, come on, reading and interpreting a legal contract isn't exactly going to be much use when the earth is drowning under the weight of its environmental degradation.

I like it. I like it a lot.

In fact, I know I could learn a lot more if I shut the f* up and paid attention to what was going on.

Sorry, I know this is a bit rambling — no, I'm not drunk or high — but I need to get out and down what's happening.

Blessings to you all.


Photo by Karl Marion on Unsplash