“Most people confuse their life situation with their actual life, which is an underlying flow beneath the everyday events.” -- Richard Rohr
Our lives are too often ordered by controlling what’s out there -- how we look, how others perceive us, what we have/don’t have and a whole morass of unholy ego wants.
Very few people look within:
Who am I?
What’s my purpose?
Why am I here?
Am I my thoughts?
Why should they? If nothing else, it’s painful.
When I posit the question, Who am I?, I don’t just do so to know who Julian is but instead to get closer to the higher Self (it’s not the question per se, but the process of self-enquiry that matters). Put another way, if you take away the external appearance and the monkey-mind chatter, what’s left?
More than ever I recognise the times when I come closest to my true Self arise when I don’t cling to the external, and collapse into my egoic delusions. It’s not easy but I know my true Self isn’t going to be awakened by chasing a whole slew of dreams, which are premised on becoming the most of me within a material world.
I suppose what it comes down is allowing everything to drop away -- the desires, the dreams and dependency. Only when that happens will we be at peace.
I’m aware that this type of post has the air of superiority, but I hope you won’t see it that way. I’m just as frail and uncertain as the next person; but all I’m trying to say is life, particularly the latter part, if it’s to mean anything, has to find resonance beyond the story of the industrial paradigm.
I’m well aware that in seeking answers to the aforementioned questions, you might end up replacing one form of egoic seeking for another. But as Adyashanti says,
“With a true and authentic awakening, who and what we are becomes clear. There’s no longer a question about it; it’s a done deal. In this way, one of the hallmarks of a true awakening is the end of seeking.”
And I suppose that’s it. Are we prepared to give up all seeking...materialistic or otherwise?